The next best thing to gridlock

Whenever bureaucrats in Washington are "getting things done" you can be assured of two things, they are curtailing more of our freedoms in favor of nanny-state oversight and they are plotting new and creative ways to seize more of our paychecks. So when the media complain that Congress is in gridlock and aren't "getting things done", I celebrate. Well the democrats control both houses so there's no gridlock, but thankfully Nanny-State Nancy is distracted from legislation, by saving the planet from the global warming menace, by "greening" the congressional cafeteria. (It's exactly like distracting a child from a hot stove by giving it a pot and wodden spoon to bang it with.)

The processed cheese has been replaced with brie. The Jell-O has made way for raspberry kiwi tarts and mini-lemon blueberry trifles. Meatloaf has moved over for mahi mahi and buns have been shunted aside in favor of baguettes.

A revolution is afoot at the deli counters, grills and salad bars of the U.S. House of Representatives.

Newly ascendant Democrats may have hit roadblocks on Iraq and fiscal issues, but they have revamped congressional menus, replacing fatty, pre-made foods with healthier, gourmet alternatives. The once dreary congressional cafeterias now abound with haute cuisine.

The menu transformation is part of Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s “Greening the Capitol” plan to make the House campus more environmentally friendly and socially progressive.

But there can be a downside to delicious. Not everyone is happy with the enhanced offerings. Many congressional employees have complained that as the food quality has increased, so have the prices.

“It’s a big jump from high school cafeteria to fancy-pants gourmet. I just wish my pay improved,” said Caryn Schenewerk, a staffer for Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-Ariz.).

A fruit and cheese side dish with two small wedges of brie and cheddar, six grapes, two saltines and one strawberry cost $4.95, for example.

Stupid compostable straws don't stand up too well to hot coffee, Nancy. To liberals like Nancy Pelosi, it's all about intentions over results---who cares if the compostable straws don't work, the important thing is that she's trying to save the planet.

Nancy Pelosi is a vile, loathsome wretch. So I guess the silver lining to the whole global-warming hoax is that liberals like her are easily distracted from harming America, and into harmlessly foisting their idiotic brand of enviromoonbattery onto diners at the cafeteria. It's too bad for the staffers who have to eat ridiculously expensive rabbit food, use only one recycled napkin, and drink from soft, biodegradable straws, but it's good for America in that she's not increasing our taxes or curtailing our freedoms.

Hat tip to Politico.com.