Hillary receives a new campaign prop

Hillary's can't-miss, ace-in-the-hole campaign prop arrived just in time for her White House run.

Bill's thought bubble, "Quick, let's make a list of all the ways we can use her to our political advantage over the next two years."

OJ was lopping off heads before it was cool

You may remember that OJ Simpson almost decapitated his wife Nicole Brown when he killed her and her friend Ron Goldman with a knife. Apparently Simpson is attempting to convert to Islam in prison after hearing the he won't be eligible for parole until 2017. Though he's having some difficulty with the fasting part.....evidently Juice likes his snacks and cheated at the prison canteen during the fasting time of Ramadan. 

As my friend Barry over on FB observed, "Seems OJ was an original "beheader" before it became cool......."

Obama counts on having plausible deniability

According to a GAO(Government Accountability Office) President Obama has only attended about 41% of his PDB's (Presidential Daily Briefing). This is where the CIA and other intelligence guys inform the President of the goings on in the world that he needs to know about on a daily basis.

Why would the commander in chief miss so many PDB's? And is it on purpose? I think he intentionally misses them so that he'll have what's known as plausible deniability when something blows up in his face.....something like Benghazi or ISIS suddenly taking over most of Iraq. He wants to be able to say, "I didn't know about it until I saw it on the news just like you". He knows the media will protect him and most gullible Americans will forgive him for being caught off guard and will eventually forget about it. That way he doesn't have to take any action on anything foreign-policy related and can instead concentrate on fundamentally transforming America into the second-rate welfare state he's dreamed of his whole life.

I'd be interested to know what he was doing instead of being briefed on world affairs. My guess is either playing golf or fund raising.

What happens in the men's room.......

So I just had an unnerving, StarWars experience......in the men's room, and it's not what you people think, get your minds out of the gutter.

I depart the stall to find two fully armed police officers with flack jackets and helmets staring at me suspiciously. Without being told "freeze scumbag!" I freeze anyway and as innocently as possible ask, "Can I help you fellas?"

After a second they visibly relax, look at each other and the one closest to me says, "He's not the guy we're looking for", and they head back out the door.

The only possible explanation is that I subconsciously used a Jedi mind-trick on them. Less likely is that there's a suspicious intruder in the building, they were called to find him, and they thought I might have been him, hiding in the bathroom.

I'm going with the Jedi mind-trick.

I would have been more cooperative if she had stormed the bathroom..... 

James Clapper's turn under the Hope-and-Change bus

In his soft-ball 60 Minutes interview last night, when asked about how badly his administration misjudged the ISIS threat and for so long, Obama predictably threw the Director of National Intelligence, James Clapper under the very crowded Hope-and-Change bus.

"Jim Clappper has acknowledged that I think they underestimated what had been taking place in Syria."

What was promised to James Clapper that he'll take the fall for Obama's failing to recognize a gathering threat for the past two years? There's no way the intelligence community missed that. Somebody knew what was happening and the derelicts in the administration purposefully ignored it, hoping it would either not happen or happen after he was out of office.

B'ham man defies seemingly insurmountable odds.....gets hit by train

A guy here in B'ham got hit by a train last night. The article says he was trying to cross the tracks. Seriously?

It takes at most 3 steps and maybe 3 seconds to cross a set of tracks. What are the odds that at precisely those three seconds, a train is at that exact point too? (I could calculate that, and I just might.)

But let's allow that you're a very slow walker, it's not like you don't know where a train might be. They don't run up on sidewalks and kill people. How do you not look....even if you are a drunk hobo, which he might not have been?

Laura Ingraham has Obama pegged

Laura Ingraham thinks that Obama sending 3,000 troops to combat, and certainly be exposed to, Ebola in Africa is his way of extending his father's rage against America's colonial past.

According to Obama's father and certainly Obama himself, Africa is poor and destitute because America is rich and privileged, therefor America's wealth must be transferred to Africa and the American people must be as vulnerable as Africans are. He's using the US military to symbolically "level the playing field". 

To Obama, if Africans see rich, privileged, white Americans suffering from the same maladies that plague the dark continent, they'll feel better about themselves because America is finally getting what it deserves.

Laura might be on to something.

Al Sharpton has delusions of grandeur

Al Sharpton claims that he's advising Obama on who to nominate to replace Eric Holder as AG. 

First, it's Valerie Jarret that makes all these decisions, not Obama, and I seriously doubt that she's listening to Sharpton do anything except brag about how he helped burn down half of Ferguson, MO. 

Besides she knows what his advice would be..."Uh, you should pick the black guy or gal who is the most virulently contemptuous of whites, has a demonstrated track record of this contempt, and has a law degree." 

Valerie Jarret is already going to do that, she doesn't need Sharpton's help.

China's navy is like a baby duck in a pool with US Navy sharks

There are some reports trickling out of China that they believe with the US distracted, as always, in the middle east and with their own grandiose view of their naval power, China believes that they can engage in military action, maybe against Taiwan, and successfully keep the US from interfering.

Heh heh, not bloody likely. The US has 70 or so nuclear attack submarines, 33 of which are stations in the Pacific, the entire 7th Fleet stationed in Japan, and a handful of aircraft carriers in the Pacific at any given time.

There aren't 5 navies combined in the world who could stand up to the US Navy. If China thinks we aren't paying attention, or bizarrely thinks she's got a competent navy, let them try something with Taiwan and find out what being on the business end of raw naval power feels like.

Muslim are natural criminals

Noryway deported over 5,000 foreigners last year as a new way to fight crime. That's a 31% increase from 2012. The chief nationalities of those deported are Nigerians, Afghans, Moroccans, and Iraqi's and the chief religion of those deported is Muslim.

It would seem that the Norwegians have figured out that importing peasants, supporting them as wards of the state, and allowing them to not assimilate to Norwegian culture, is inviting their criminal behavior, and they've had enough of it.

Good for the Norwegians. Surely the other countries who've graciously, and ignorantly, I mean if we're being honest, imported Muslims into their country to show how accepting and open-hearted they are, will follow Norway's lead and start to repatriate the criminally minded Muslims who are essentially squatting in their countries. No doubt the US will never do this as we are too far gone down the path of self-loathing, self-destruction, and moonbattery to stop now.

Somebody call Orkin, dirty hippies are in the city

Hundreds of thousands of illiterate idiots showed up in New York over the weekend to rabble-rouse about the imaginary menace of climate change.

You'd think at least one of them would have learned about the judicious use of apostrophes to show possession before dropping out of high school to become derelicts and bums, full-time.

Additionally, how concerned about the planet could they be while flooding the streets of New York with a deluge of litter?

California schools plunge the depths of madness

In the tyrannical abyss of insanity known as California, a student cannot even share his lunch with a friend without receiving detention. An 8th grader shared his burrito with a friend because the disgusting cheese sandwich his friend got was too disgusting to eat.

So because a contagion of smarmy trial lawyers might sue the school if that kid happened to have allergies he didn't know about, and because drone-like education administrators cannot think for themselves, their zero-tolerance policy kicked in and the kid received detention for his "crime".

The one bright spot in this story other than he's nice to his friends, is that the kid resists the Orwellian notion that he was wrong to have defied the nonsensical rules and says that he'd do it again if the opportunity presented itself.

Good for you kid, resist the depraved madness that infests public education in America.

Wouldn't you rather have a burrito too? 

Media over-hype another story

So the media breathlessly reported this weekend on the war vet who hopped the white house fence with "a 2-1/2inch folding knife with a serrated blade". Or in other words, a pocket knife.

Show me a war veteran, or boy-scout for that matter, who doesn't carry a pocket knife. There were no reports that he was brandishing or otherwise threatening anybody with the knife, yet the news media were fixated on the "knife with a serrated blade". Apparently being serrated makes it a more threatening weapon in the eyes of the hysterical, ignorant media.

Adrian Peterson with his kid

Everybody's got their panties in a bunch because the Vikes are paying Adrian Peterson his $12 Million salary for this year, despite being put on the "exempt" list....essentially he's suspended from all team activities after he severely beat both his kids with switches.

First, getting harshly disciplined with beatings is part of the African-American culture. That's right I said it, everybody knows it, and unless you live in a cave, you've witnessed it numerous times in public, cringing, unable to look away.

And second, unless he has a domestic violence exclusion in his contract, the Vikings are contractually obligated to pay him whether he plays or not.

I'm guessing every professional sports employment contract from now on will, and should have a domestic violence exclusion clause, but most of the current ones apparently do not.

The question is, is there a difference between Ray Rice knocking out his then fiance' with a punch to the head in a casino elevator, and Adrian Peterson switching his kid and leaving skin lacerations on his backside? Are both equally horrific examples of domestic violence? 

I say there's a difference, which is probably why Ray Rice isn't getting paid and Adrian Peterson is. 

Barbara Streisand's fans are among the stupidest of all time

Barbara Streisand's fans might be the dumbest, most gullible of all entertainment fandoms. In 2000 she "retired" and sold out a "farewell tour" at like $70 Million, followed by a comeback tour which made her another $100 Million, followed by another "retirement" which rocketed her record sales since people believed her latest album was her last. 

Now she's announced yet another album which is certain to hit #1 and with the tour that'll go with it, she'll rake in another couple hundred million off her stupid fans. No doubt she'll hint that this is really her last album and her final farewell tour.......at least until the next one.  

When are you morons going to learn that these celebrities are playing you?

Obama declares war on Ebola, but not ISIS

Obama will only send a token amount, about 1,600, "advisory" troops to combat ISIS, the gravest terrorist threat in the world today, but he's sending 3,000 troops to die in Liberia from Ebola.

Liberia is a forgotten, God-forsaken abyss of a country that no modern nation cares anything about, yet Obama is willing to have our soldiers go there to do what? Apparently they will be "supervising" the movement and transport of things. Why can't the Liberian troops supervise the movement and transport of things?

If there's anyway to get American 18 year olds to NOT join the military, tell them they'll be fighting a well armed and well funded terrorist organization in the Iraqi desert for the next 10 years or he'll be fighting Ebola in the jungles of Africa.

If I didn't know any better, I'd think Obama was intentionally trying to destroy what little morale was left in our military.

Here come the judge

If you haven't read Judge Andrew Napolitano's article, "An Unhappy Summer for Liberty", read it now. With the possible exception of the Ferguson, MO affair, from which we don't yet have all the evidence, I pretty much agree with his points regarding domestic violations of the Constitution as well as our suspect motives for endless war in the middle east. Give it a look-see.

Obama's ISIS plan is an optical success, but a results failure

So, Obama's plan is to destroy ISIS with overwhelming air power and by arming Iraqi and Syrian soldiers and rebels to do the fighting for us/themselves. 

Does anybody think this will work?

First, ISIS fighters are indistinguishable from civilians when viewed through a gun-sight camera at 20,000 feet. Unless we personally interview every person in Iraq, face-to-face, while pointing a gun to their head, we cannot eradicate them. 

Second, the Iraqi soldiers Obama wants to now further train and arm are the same ones who we've been training for the last 10 years and who at the first sign of trouble from ISIS, dropped their weapons and ran away. Have they suddenly discovered some guts?

Third, who the hell knows what we'll be getting by arming ANY Syrian rebels? The last time we armed Syrian rebels, they turned out to be ISIS. And the last two times we supported rebels who fought for regime change we ended up with a lawless Libya and an Egypt controlled by ideologues whose affection for the US is uncertain at best. 

How stupid are we? Without a total re-occupation of Iraq, we cannot defeat ISIS to the point that they are not a threat. Even then, they'll just flee to Iran, Syria, Afghanistan, or somewhere else to regroup. 

It is my belief that we are too late to the ISIS game to do anything useful except waste a ton of money dropping bombs almost uselessly in the desert. 

But at least we'll be creating weapons-manufacturing jobs back home......which if we were brutally honest with ourselves, is the real reason we are so eager to make war in the middle east on a continuous basis......how else would our politicians funnel money to the defense contractors who bribe them with lavish vacations, parties, and gifts? Or am I being to cynical?

Sanctimonious Americans love to hate Apple

This is the image bouncing around Facebook today. Of course sanctimonious Americans like to pretend that they are empathetic toward the plight of the third world "iSlave", but let's be honest, how many of them would give up their personal electronics, shoes, or other third-world produced goods that make easy, their lives of idle decadence? 

In fact, I'll bet there isn't much in our lives of relative comfort and leisure that isn't produced at some level by grateful peasants in third-world countries. And I would argue that by not consuming these items, whether for moral or solidarity reasons, you may contributing to their lives of squalor and misery, for without sweat shops and dangerous factories to work in, what would they be doing? Begging, panhandling, waiting for relief organizations to hand them a bowl of rice each day......or maybe nothing at all?

But one thing is for sure, phony, self-righteous American sanctimony won't fill up the stomachs of starving babies in Africa and China. 

Joblessness is OK in the age of hope and change

A recent Bureau of Labor Statistics survey showed that only 19.8% of people collecting unemployment checks actually looked for work on an average day, spending 2.5 hours doing so when they did it, while 40.8% spent time shopping.

But 96,7% of the unemployed admitted to spending time "socializing, relaxing, and on leisure activities", spending 5.98 hours doing so.....more than twice what they spent job hunting.

The chronically unemployed also reported that they got 9.76 hours of sleep each night, which is roughly 50% more than I get working my two jobs.

In the age of hope and change, it's good to be unemployed apparently.....not so much for those of us paying for their lives of idle leisure.

Putin leverages his space-travel monopoly

Alert reader David sent this in: "On Monday, the Russian Federal Space Agency (Roscosmos) announced plans to move survival training for all Soyuz passengers to a Russian naval base in Sevastopol, Crimea."

Vlad Putin brilliantly played his monopoly on space travel card. If nations with space programs want to access the ISS, their astronauts must pass splash-down survival school run by the Russians since only they are currently transporting people to the space station. 

Sending astronauts to the Crimea for training amounts to de-facto acceptance of Russian "annexation" of Crimea from the Ukraine. If countries like the US, Canada, Japan, Germany, etc want to go to space, we have to go through the Russians to get there. 

I guess we're just lucky to have Putin to give us a ride to space since Obama made it NASA's primary mission to make Muslims feel better about their imaginary contributions to science, technology, or pretty much anything that improves western civilization. 

Obama and ISIS

When Ronald Reagan unwisely trained and funded the Mujaheddin in Afghanistan to resist the Russians, he never thought they would eventually morph into the Taliban and Al Qaeda and turn against us with the same money, weapons, and expertise we gave them. 

25 years later, you'd think Obama would be able to resist stepping on that very same rake, but you'd be wrong. As recently as June, Obama was still requesting $500 Billion to fund the ISIS terrorists...I mean rebels, to resist Bashar al-Assad in Syria......that is after our CIA funded, trained, and armed them in Jordan.

Now they too have turned against us and are committing atrocities with our money, weapons, and battlefield expertise, yet in combating terrorism, Obama seems oblivious to his direct, ironic role in the creation of the world's worst terrorist group. 

 With a hat tip to Moonbattery.

California cougar just doing what California cougars do

You all know how I love a good, wild-animal-mauls-human, story. 

Well, some dumb family in Cupertino, Ca went hiking in a park where signs are clearly posted warning of the presence of mountain lions and predictably, their 6 year old son was attacked by a mountain lion during their hike.

Now the authorities are hunting down the lion to kill it. WHY? They were in his territory. He was just doing what mountain lions do.....because he's a mountain lion.

I hope the cougar gets away and attacks the hunters, mauls them badly.....then eats some more dumb hikers.

Obama finally reveals his ISIS strategy

So this week President Obama is supposed to reveal his strategy for dealing with the well-funded terrorist group ISIS. The gist of it is we will bomb the crap out of them from the sky with the air force and drones, both in Syria and Iraq or where ever we can pinpoint their operations. Additionally any boots-on-the-ground will belong to Syrians or Iraqis.......heh heh that is if we can find any that aren't cowards.

I'm generally in favor of this strategy as a first effort, though I doubt it'll accomplish what we want which is the destruction of ISIS's capability to commit genocide and export terrorism to the west. But we can give it a try before re-invading Iraq with an allied army.

See, this is what happens when the US decides that we don't like middle east dictators and take it upon ourselves to depose them and impose our particular brand of democracy on what's left of the country.

ISIS would never have taken hold in Mubarak's Egypt, Assad's Syria, Hussein's Iraq, or Qaddafi's Libya. Those guys ran their countries like mob bosses in the US run their drug, gambling, extortion, and prostitution operations. Theirs is the only game allowed in town and they'll kill anybody who tries to muscle in on the operation. That's how the middle east has always been run and the US should stop playing Elliot Ness to the world and let them maintain control over their own countries.

National GOP expanding their tent

The GOP just announced that it has a $6 Million plan to help get 150 minorities and women elected to state and national seats as soon as possible.

I have to say this is about the best thing the GOP could do to remove the false stigma that conservatism is the movement of white males, to the intentional exclusion of blacks and women.

Lying democrats take that message to the bank every election, so if there are lots of women and blacks holding GOP seats, democrats can't really make that argument any more.

My suggestions would be to include some gay conservatives in the mix and then multiply that money by like 10x and see what they can get done in the next few election cycles. 

Obama, it's all about him

Here is a group photo from a UN summit taken earlier today. Can you pick out the adolescent, narcissist douche?

Yeah, that's him, our President, as always drawing attention to himself over everybody else. Seriously? Waving to the photographer in a group photo, like a third grader waving to his parents after his first class play......and this after he probably elbowed his way into the front row-center position. 

Fast food workers refuse to recognnize the inevitable

Meet Adrianna Alvarez, another disgruntled fast-food worker who feels entitled to far more than the minimum wage she currently enjoys being paid. She says that their demands for a $15/hour wage is "just the beginning" and that they'll demand far more in the future.

I'd like to point out to Miss Alvarez that the housekeeping staff at the robotics plant where her inevitable replacements are being made probably get paid pretty well. Maybe she should go ahead and put in her application now to avoid the rush when all FF joints move to robotics and workers like her find themselves out on the streets.

It's just a shame for her, and no doubt her parents who had higher hopes for her future, that her lifelong career goals culminated with----poorly preparing burgers, carelessly wrapping them up, and tossing them in bags for people who are better than her.

Trust me, the irony of workers performing housekeeping duties for the machines that replaced them, because they demanded to be paid more than they're worth, won't be lost on me. I'll be reminding them of it constantly......that is between fits of laughter.

Obama is out of his mind

In a speech this morning from Estonia, Pres. Obama suggested that we must "organize the Arab world" in an effort to reduce ISIS to a "manageable size".

WHAT?

The Arab world cannot be organized by anybody to do anything, and certainly not by an effete American President for whom most of the civilized and uncivilized world has zero respect. Does Obama think that the Arab world will bend to his will because his name sounds like theirs?

The time to have acted on ISIS was a year or two ago when he first received actionable intelligence on them from Syria. They control part of Syria and most of Iraq now and they're somehow raking in $1-$2 Million every day by most reports, from the very Arab states from whom Obama would seek assistance......there's no making them manageable.

We have two choices now that we've sat around with our thumb up our butts for two years. Either we continue to watch the weekly beheadings of American and British civilians while we wait for ISIS to bring the fight to our doorstep, or we re-occupy Iraq and possibly Syria for like the next 20 years trying to clean those countries of these animals.

What's it going to be?

I depart slightly from hard-core Libertarianism

So the standard Libertarian foreign policy doctrine regarding military intervention is: do not use the US military unless the US or our close allies are in immediate danger. We should not be invading and occupying every third-world shithole and deposing their dictator because our media aren't comfortable sipping over-priced white wine on their designer leather couches, at their Georgetown cocktail parties while watching unpleasant images of far away conflicts and humanitarian crises.

I generally agree with that.

That said, Libertarians are hesitant for the US military to return to Iraq or Syria to deal with ISIS, because it might mean yet another long-term, outrageously expensive occupation of one or both of those countries. I sort of agree with that also. But here's where I depart from the hard-core Libertarians:

Because many American and British citizens have gone to fight with them and could one of these days return using valid passports, even more radicalized than when they left, ISIS does represent, in my view, a gathering threat against the US and Great Britain, far more so than Al Qaeda or the Taliban......I mean if you ever believed that Taliban was a threat......I do not. For these reasons, the Bush doctrine of taking the fight to the enemy on their land rather than waiting for them to come here is a valid one in this case.

Here is my caveat to the Bush doctrine: Send in a limited, specialized force who, along with a tactical drone strikes, kill as many ISIS fighters, especially the American and British nationals, with extreme prejudice. Take care of business and get out. No occupation. No nation building. No election monitoring. No building schools or bridges or power plants. No nothing except killing as many ISIS guys as we can find as fast as possible, then come home.