I know this isn't supposed to be a funny story but it sort of is...
A graduate student from the University of Central Florida is missing after he was pulled underwater by a large sea turtle, according to Local 6 News.
Officials said the man vanished Thursday afternoon about three miles north of the Sebastian Inlet and 400 yards out to sea, sheriff's officials said.
The student was apparently tagging turtles as part of a UCF research project.
"The person was onboard a Boston Whaler with other students when a large turtle pulled the victim underwater," Local 6's Bob Frier said.
I would be interested in hearing the eyewitness account of how a slow-swimming, 700lb sea-turtle leapt out of the ocean, grabbed a man with his what...beak, and dragged him into the water. That turtle doesn't need to be tagged...he needs to be in the circus.
With all the Gore-esque efforts to Save the Turtles, Save the Whales, Save the Three-Finned, Speckled Ridge Newt, how many times would you imagine any single turtle(they live like 120 years) has been captured and tagged?
I'll bet this turtle had had enough of the tagging and said to itself, "Self, if this idiot college student tries to stick that stupid box on my shell for the umpteenth time, I swear, I'll drag him to the bottom of the ocean and let the phytoplankton feast on him".
If idiot-Al would stop flying all over the world in his ozone-destroying Leer jet telling everyone to stop destroying the ozone, I'm quite sure the turtles, whales, and newts will be just fine.