LONDON (Reuters) - Britain's biggest theme park has called off the country's first "National Muslim Fun Day" because of lack of interest, the park said Wednesday.
Alton Towers in central England was to open on September 17 for Muslims -- with halal food, a strict dress code and prayer areas.
Music, gambling and alcohol were to be banned for the day and theme park rides such as "Ripsaw," "Corkscrew" and "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" all segregated by sex.
Organizers had hoped to fill a niche for Britain's 1.7 million Muslims, some of whom may be uncomfortable with mainstream entertainment.
You've got to be kidding me! National Muslim Fun Day?
And what exactly can a fun-loving Muslim, on holiday from waging jihad against the Great Satan and the evil Jooooos, expect in the form of activities from a Muslim oriented theme park? To answer that question, operatives for TheRightRant were dispatched to London and were able to get an advanced look at the park and here is their report:
Slay the Infidels Arcade:
"Whack-an-Infidel" -- use the Club of Allah to smash the skulls of infidels as they appear from their holes to mock Islam.
"Bomb-Toss" -- try to achieve a high score with this test of your bomb-throwing accuracy and skill. The more accurate your toss, the more western sympathasizers and unbelievers are slain.
"Carbomb Bumpercars" -- you are a fearless Hezbollah fighter as you drive your Toyota truck laden with "explosives" around the rink. Avoid collisions and marine checkpoints before you reach your destination...the marine barracks in virtual Beirut.
"The Burqa Wars" -- you and a friend compete by shooting at a U.S. Marine-shaped target with water AK-47's. The more accurate your stream the further down the burqa comes off the virgin in the window. If you are a true marksman of Islamic Jihad, by the end of the game her face will be partially exposed...she'll be practically naked.
Reality-Based Thrill Rides:
"The 9/11" -- Relive the thrilling flight of your Muslim brethren right up to impact as they deliver righteous justice to the great Satan in this virtual reality experience second to none.
"The 7/11" -- Feel the concussion of the blasts and see the glass and sheet metal fly, smell the acrid burning smoke, and take pleasure in the screams and wails of horrified women and children as they flee the London subway bombings in this very realistic virtual reality ride.
And currently under development, Islamic Military Victories over Israel. Unfortunately, this extremely short ride is "under construction" indefinitely, due to lack of features.