Birmingham, Alabama is eaten up with wild-eyed Crimson Tide fans, especially now that the second coming of the Christ-child, Nick Saban, is the head coach. And an Alabama fan will stop at nothing to protect the team even if it means throwing his own daughter under the bus to protect a player who probably beat her up. Here's this year's nominee for Crimson Tide Father of the Year....
I hate to see this guy get in too much trouble because I honestly think it was probably initiated by my daughter. I don't think he laid a hand on her. He just tried to restrain her to keep from getting hit again."
This dad knows that if his daughter proves to be a distraction to Saban, and in any way jeopardizes what every Alabama fan ignorantly expects every year....a perfect season and national championship, he'll be a pariah around Tuscaloosa and will forever be shunned by Tide fans. And that's a fate worse than death in this state. So in a choice between a 300lb player and his daughter....a true Alabama dad will always go with the Tide. Because daughters come and go but, Alabama season tickets and team loyalty are the true measures of a man.
Thanks to regular reader Kevin for sending this story in.