Ending years of rumor, speculation, and conjecture, today, American Idol contestant and C-lister Clay Aiken clawed his way out of the dustbin of Hollywood obscurity by announcing that he's gay. In other shocking news, NASA announced recently that the sky is blue, the Navy announced that the ocean is wet, yet Barack Obama continues to deny that he's really a subversive socialist.
A limerick for Clay:
There once was a singer name Clay
Who came out of the closet as gay
To revive his career
But he's no pioneer
'Cause Manilow ownes that cliche'
So Aiken admits his impurity
To escape from celeb obscurity
But here's the real thing,
He can't really sing
So success may not be a surety
Who cares if you're gay or you're straight?
You can see Clay with your date
He appears every night
Much to travelers' delight
At La Quinta just off Exit 8
If you dare, feel free to write one of your own in the comments thread. It's not as easy as it looks.
Did Reuben say he is fat?
ReplyDeleteIs Ellen Really gay?
Puzzling questions for puzzling times.
Rosie O'Donnel announced she needs to eat a salad once in a while.
ReplyDeleteNow, Anon, that is something I refuse to believe.
ReplyDeleteI think the world new Clay Aiken was gay before Clay Aiken knew Clay Aiken was gay.
I looked through a blog one day,
ReplyDeleteWho is this girl named Clay?
But what is this thing?
This girl has a ding?
O this guy must be gay.
First limerick, just based on Ed's. Doesn't make much too much since and isn't very witty but I'm just getting the rhyme and rythem down for now.
As I look at this picture right now,
ReplyDeleteI think to myself holy cow,
If you are a guy,
Then green is the sky,
If you are not gay what art thou?
Ed your limericks are sweet,
ReplyDeleteClay is weirder than feet,
This man makes me bile,
He's gay as a pile,
Even Jackson can't try to compete.
Nicely done, all. I'll be dropping limericks or maybe Haiku's from time to time so be sure to keep up.
ReplyDeleteBACK TO THE PILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletesomeone had to do it, sorry.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteKevin, I'm left in the dark
ReplyDeleteUnless you refer to South Park
Please take the time
To compose a short rhyme
As you calculate minutes of arc
Haha, I am way to busy...
ReplyDeleteEd how could you not know,
ReplyDeletethe origin from which my rhymes flow...
Cant come up with anything else but that the gist.
How about this?
ReplyDeleteEd, how could you not know,
the origin from which my rhymes flow?
We deserve explanation
And clarification.
Make a chart, like H. Ross Perot
My reply:
Michael, you suffer delusion
That my wisdom is foregone conclusion
While I do know a lot
Some things I've forgot
Which explains the occassional exclusion
My vocabulary can't comprehend,
ReplyDeleteThese words to me that you lend,
Those words I can't use,
But thats no excuse,
On a dictionary you probly depend.
Micheal my friend, when you reach
ReplyDeleteMy years like grains on the beach,
Just like all the nerds
You'll know all the words
You're vocab no one'll impeach